The State Security Apparatus of Iron Felix is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Felix Dzerzhinsky with an iron fist, and remarkable for its flagrant waste-dumping, unlimited-speed roads, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 37.883 billion Iron Felix are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wherever Felix is. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 86.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Iron Felix economy, worth a remarkable 8,779 trillion New Yeldan Pounds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Uranium Mining, and Automobile Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 231,756 New Yeldan Pounds, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,311,718 per year while the poor average 20,062, a ratio of 65.4 to 1.

Jails have become colloquially known as 'vampire houses', the world outside is only known of in folklore, the dead are minced up and sold to people in burger form, and otherwise healthy people are being sent to internment camps because they have VODAIS. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Iron Felix's national animal is the WA Gnome, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Stalinism.

Iron Felix is ranked 270,733^rd in the world and 31^st in Antarctic Oasis for Most Cultured, scoring 56 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.